Thursday, December 25, 2008

Don't Push My Buttons!

I constantly hear people talking about how things should come with an easy button; kids, work... everything. But wouldn't it also be nice if certain things came with a delete button? No more pretending that "that never happened" or hoping that someone would forget that really stupid uh-oh you did last week.

Perhaps we would be able to "unsee" things, like the kid puking in the resturant or the woman who unsuccessfully stuffed herself into some spandex.

How great would it be, if we could delete the mess in the women's bathroom! It would be a miracle! Or better yet, delete the line that's creating the mess in the women's bathroom! What a revolution it would be for the women's public bathroom experience!

Now, to make it worse, there are "family bathrooms" where both men and women can go into the same bathroom without feeling awkward about taking your toddler boy to the women's room or your toddler girl into the men's room. I'm sorry, but there is a reason why men need to use a stall far, far away from women. I don't know about you, but that's some funk that need never come to my nose! And to all you men, a courtesy flush just doesn't do it.

Imagine being able to delete every nasty comment that ruined your day. I know we say "just ignore it" and we try to just let it go and move on.... It works in theory anyway.

The most amazing button of all though, would be the Delete Bullshit button. It would be so much easier to make our way in this world if we weren't wading knee deep in it. We are all equipped with our own Delete Bullshit button, some people just choose not to use theirs. Those people deserve to be banished to the women's bathroom.

* A special thanks to all those Custodians who attempt to keep the women's bathroom clean for the rest of us. I know trying is sometimes futile, but you do it anyway. Much love to you!

No comments:

Post a Comment